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Napoleon at Aberdeen Proving Ground

Now it can be told



Napoleon at Aberdeen Proving Ground

In a miracle of modern times, scientists succeeded in reviving Emperor of the French Napoleon and several of his marshals. Soon, they were invited to visit Army's Aberdeen Proving Ground in Maryland. The Pentagon hosts realized that the French were Europeans and graciously arranged the accommodations for the guests in a hotel with breakfast included, smoking permitted, and without Fox News Channel in the TV channel lineup.

After breakfast, the marshals headed to see a demonstration of new weaponry at the proving ground. Napoleon, however, returned to his room. In the evening after the dinner, the guests gathered together for cognac and cigars in the hotel bar.

The French military veterans were ebullient, sharing their impressions of the day. "Your Imperial Majesty," said dashing Marshal Michel Ney to the emperor. "You cannot even imagine this. The weaponry, rifles, tanks, artillery, aircraft, all were majestic. Had we had only a fraction of those, I would have captured Quatre Bras and we would have never lost Waterloo!"

Napoleon thought for a moment and then replied, "My dear marshal. I believe you, but I have discovered another, even more potent weapon. As you know I stayed in my room all day, flipping TV channels. It was incredible and fantastic. Had we had such media, the world would have never learned that we lost Waterloo."


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